Posted by: devinmoore | September 7, 2010

The Internet License Test

License version 9.8.10

This is the unofficial licensing test for using the Internet. If you pass this test with 100% right, you have an unofficial license to operate the Internet for consumer purposes. If you cannot pass this test with 100% right, you need to seek technical assistance to use the Internet and you should NOT use it without having someone present who did pass this test with 100% right to help prevent you from doing something that is potentially harmful to yourself, your system, or to others and their systems.

0. What is the minimum legal age in the USA to be able to use most of the Internet by yourself?

a. 10
b. 13
c. 16
d. 18

1. When you need to know how to do something, what do you do first?

a. post your question to a forum
b. search with google
c. post your question to a Q&A site
d. ask your friends or colleagues

2. Which of these is true?
a. Bob Dylan got the song “blowin’ in the wind” from a new jersey high school student.
b. Thieves hide under cars and will cut your ankles to steal from you.
c.  A house fire was caused by spontaneous combustion of a houseplant.
d. A teenage driver was killed by a dashboard Jesus statue.

3.  Which of these is a scam?

a.  Making money posting links on the internet through ordering a kit from google or yahoo.
b.  Buying an item off of ebay from a seller who will not accept an escrow payment.
c.  A relative claiming to have been mugged out of the country asks you to wire or money-gram them some money to help them get back home safely.
d.  You get an email saying you won a foreign lottery of some kind, and you’re entitled to a huge sum of cash if you just pay a certain processing fee.

4. Your computer is running slow.  What is the most likely cause of, and solution to this problem?

a.  Viruses, anti-virus scanner
b. Malware, malware remover
c. Malware and Viruses, anti-virus and malware software
d. Malware and Viruses, anti-virus and malware software and safe downloading habits

5.  How can you tell if a download or website is safe to visit?

a.  The download/page says it’s safe right on the page
b.  Your friends all downloaded it and they said its safe
c.   A real-time virus scanner says it’s safe
d.  The site hosting it has a reputation for distributing safe software

6. My bank sent me an email asking me to click a link and login, what should I do?

a. Click the link and login, after all it’s from the bank
b. Click the link and see if it looks ok to login
c. Do not click the link at all
d. Do not click the link at all, and call the bank to let them know

7. I just joined Facebook, and I want to post my status updates or place updates.  Who should I assume will be able to see them?

a. Just me
b. My friends and me
c. Friends of my friends, my friends, and me
d. Everyone on the internet, including the people I hate most in the world

8. My home wireless quit working all of a sudden.  What should I do?

a. Unplug everything, wait 2 minutes, and plug it back in
b. Call the cable company
c. Search google
d. Call a tech-savvy friend/etc.

9. Which of these is the most reliable way to tell if your internet connection is working?

a. clear your cache and try surfing to
b. try surfing to any website
c. clear your cache and try to do a search
d. try surfing to

10.  I think I bought something incorrectly with my credit card on the internet.  What should I do?

a. call the credit card company immediately and tell them the details
b. call the credit card company within 60 days and report a chargeback
c. e-mail the website that charged you
d. call the website that charged you

11.  My friend sent me a cool link and said to “check it out”.  They didn’t say what the link was, just to click on it.  What should I do?

a. click it and see what it is
b. ask your friend what it is first, then click on it
c. ask your friend what it is first, then google for the subject instead of clicking on your friends’ link
d. check with your friend to see if they had problems with the link first, then click on it

Answer key:

0-B.  According to the COPPA 1998 ( if you are under 13 (12 and lower), you are a “child” and your rights to have info on you collected by sites on the internet are severely restricted for your own protection.  This means using forums, etc. will likely be off limits to you on your own, sorry!
1-B. Anything else will get you referred to google anyhow, so save yourself the trouble and use google first. Sure, you can use another search engine, just search first.

2-C.  Only one of these is true.  You can solve this by using 1-B and being careful what sources you use, a critical skill for internet licensees is being able to identify a good source of facts vs. a source of misinformation.

3-all.  They are all scams.  If you thought even one was not a scam, even though the question implies one might not be a scam, then you could easily be scammed and shouldn’t operate the Internet by yourself.  This is serious business — if someone tells you something is not a scam, as this question implied, that is the surest sign that everything there is in fact a scam.

4-D.  Anti-virus and anti-malware software will help, but bad downloading habits are why you have those things in the first place.  The vast majority of viruses and malware come from either ‘wares’ sites or adult sites.  Don’t download from these or from friends who may use these sites and you will be much less likely to experience an infection.

5-D.  Anti-virus scanners are helpful, but they do not always detect either malware or the most current viruses.  You should use those as well, but above and beyond that, you can start off on the right foot by selecting a safe download location.  A website with a reputation to protect has to proactively scan anything it hosts, or else it could lose tons of business.  Antivirus companies don’t lose any money if you get infected because their EULA says they’re not liable if your machine gets messed up with a virus.  However, a company that knowingly could be hosting virus-laden software may be liable for something like that, and even if they’re not, the bad press alone from distributing a virus would crush their profits.  Always download from large reputable sites such as CNET and use anything P2P or ‘wares’ hosting AT YOUR OWN RISK.

6-D.  First, do not click links from emails asking you to login.  Always type in the URL for any secure login, and be sure that your browser reports the link as https, with no errors, and that the site is showing as the legit bank site (i.e. the site is for chase bank and not or something like that).  If you get something like this, call your bank directly at the number on the back of your bank card and tell them about it.  They have a lot riding on safety of transactions and something like that email is not safe.

7-D.  The default facebook privacy settings for anything, applications, dates, events, messages, etc. may be seen by everyone.  If you have any doubt, BEFORE you post something double-check the settings for that type of item and who will be able to see it.  Keep in mind that unless you specify otherwise, your friends will be able to tag you in pictures that they post without your permission, meaning if they got a bad picture of you and they post it, they could identify you in that picture to everyone from their page.  This is why it pays to know who your friends are and what you are sharing on facebook… and assume that everyone can see whatever you post.  Do not put anything there you wouldn’t want everyone to be able to see, just in case.

8-A.  The cable company and your friend will tell you to do this first, and if you do this first and it doesn’t work, then you have a more serious problem.  You can’t search google because you have no internet.

9-C. will work if your internet connection is working.  However, if your cache is not cleared and is your default home page, it may show up even if you clear your cache (you may not have cleared it correctly).  Try to do a google search.  If the results do not come back, then the internet may be down. Google is very, very rarely actually down.  You can try other sites, but I would try google first, because other sites are way more likely to be down than google. and other big sites regularly block ping attempts, so a ping may fail and yet your internet connection may be fine.

10-A.  Get in touch with the credit card company ASAP and give them the honest details of what happened.  If you wait too long, especially past a billing cycle, the credit card company will find it harder to cancel or to do a chargeback.  Fraudulent websites will do whatever it takes to keep your money, so emailing or calling them will probably result in no refund and/or more bad charges because now they know that your card is active.  They’ll just stall and keep charging you. Get the credit card company on them and don’t use that website again, and seriously consider getting a new card number.

11-C.  Your friend may not have had problems from the link, but then again, your friend may not be able to tell if they had problems yet.  You should never click on a link that just says “check it out” or basically any link in an email.  When in doubt, google for the subject of the link and see if you can find a legitimate link.  Google will quickly confirm if the link subject usually means trouble/spam/malware/viruses, which it very well could as this is a common means of spreading infected software.


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